MAY CAUSE DROWSINESS by Jeff Callaway (Texas Outlaw Poet)


scotch and some soda
and some sex and some soma
so i’m so stoned
in San Antonio
it sounds like Sublime’s
Scarlet Begonia’s
circle circus surround sound systems
in stereo ozones
by my side my Miss Scarlet look-alike
who’s my guide
she doesn’t remember where we’re going
and somehow i can still remember the Alamo
(and Goliad)
but as the pills begin to kick-in
its then
when i know that it’s too late
and so i pull over to the shoulder
and i park my Chevrolet
and i reach out for the pill bottle
as everything turns grey
in my head i can hear the Reverend Horton Heat
sing It’s a Dark Day
i can’t make out what the warning on the label is
trying to say when some fuzzy itchy something
comes over me in waves of OK and Oh Boy! do i
feel great
not half but whole baked
on the Texas Highway (please don’t litter) its best
to stay awake
if only i could find a Motel 6 or Super 8
or some soft silent sanctuary
to pass out straight
and so i pull into the Hotel San Antonio
and rent a room to retreat
and we have dinner and shit, shower, shave
and we’re both so beat
but still, my beautiful Miss Scarlet, rubs my feet
and she serves me a hot toddy in her old favorite-T
and an old slip with a good kiss on the cheek and then
make love (that’s hot) she’s so sexy and sweet for me
to eat and
i fall asleep
in the arms of the girl of my dreams
in sheets
wrapped up in blankets, so warm and cozy
until morning brings
in hung-over sunlight beams
and i can finally see so clearly
the words on the label, i can finally detect: